Easter

Happy Easter Monday!

1 Comment

I just wanted to take this opportunity to wish you and your loved ones a very Happy Easter.

I hope that your day was full of chocolate, hot cross buns or anything else that you do to mark this time of the year. Enjoy what’s left of this glorious four day long weekend, and may your blood sugar levels co-operate.

For me, guilt is simply not worth it when it comes to this time of the year. But at the same time, I definitely think that my days of eating until I can no longer move are behind me. I simply don’t enjoy the insomnia, night sweats and rage correcting stubbornly high blood sugar levels long into the night.

The Easter Bunny brought me exactly what I wanted this year. There’s also a bag of Woolworths Cadbury Choc Chip Hot Cross Buns sitting in my freezer. And I may or may not be heading to the shops later to pick up a bit of extra cheap chocolate (medically necessary, of course).

If you haven’t already, be sure to head over to the Dexcom UK & Ireland Facebook page and share your Easter Selfie. For each donation received, they will donate 10 pounds to Spare a Rose which provides insulin and other diabetes supplies to children in need. Have fun!

Removed From My Diabetes

1 Comment

I’m heading back to reality today after a relaxing, yet eventful Easter break, a few too many Lindt bunnies and hot cross buns.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BDhVxlpA_ev/?taken-by=franksita

I haven’t easily forgotten the exhaustion I felt towards the end of last year. I’d pushed myself too hard at the time. My mind was in overdrive thinking about all of the things I wanted to get done at once, even though I knew it wasn’t realistic. It also wasn’t realistic to be able to keep going to work day in, day out for months and months on end with no break in sight.

I’m trying to map out my breaks throughout 2016, so that I’ll have something to look forward to. I’m also trying to give myself a bit more time to breathe at the end of the day, reminding myself that all of the things on my list will still be there to do tomorrow.

Hence, a break over Easter, and a break from my blog.

I will also confess to feeling a little ‘removed’ from my diabetes for a few days over the Easter weekend. Diabetes took a bit of a backseat while I was worried about a family member who wasn’t well.

The routine things like testing my blood sugar level after lunch, or getting up to test during the night seemed pointless in comparison to what was going on. There were occasions where I would fail to give my insulin dose straight away. Seeing morning numbers like 10, 12, or even 14 on the meter are usually enough to make me either angry or emotional (or both). Yet they didn’t even upset me in the slightest at the time. In comparison to what was going on, a few high numbers felt like the least of my worries.

For almost six years, I’ve managed diabetes through uni assignments, through working, through celebrations, through burnouts, through birthdays, Christmases and Easters. Yet there’s only ever been one thing that has actually made me abandon my post as the operator of my broken pancreas.

Distress.

I felt removed from my diabetes that weekend. I felt as though my diabetes was miles and miles away from my body. I didn’t want anything to do with it. Rather, I didn’t feel compelled to do the things that I should have been doing. Those things didn’t even seem remotely important at the time.

It was bitter to see someone I loved unwell. But it was sweet to have a break, to get used to the whole not-going-to-work thing, watch movies at lunchtime and watch Autumn set in.

IMG_0803

Bitter-Sweet. Just like diabetes, right?

Exactly The Same

3 Comments

Back in April 2010, I was a freshman uni student adjusting to newfound adult life outside of school. I can remember spending much of my two week Easter break feeling overwhelmed by a couple of 2,000 word university papers that were conveniently due the first week back after break.

It’s safe to say that I didn’t spend a lot of time thinking about Easter that year. I had no idea that it would be the last time that I would be able to consume a whole Easter egg with no consequences. Or stuff my face full at Easter get togethers without having to keep a close eye on my blood sugar levels hours into the night.

Looking back on that last Easter without diabetes, I don’t really have any major regrets. Because six years later, I can’t really say that too much has changed.

I’m still making an early start on Easter eggs, and trying to hide them from everyone else at home.

DSC02016

I’ve still got a stash of Cadbury chocolate chip hot cross buns in the freezer that have become a convenient source of breakfast or lunch when I’m in a hurry.

  I still haven’t decided what I’m going to cook for Easter lunch, in my usual last minute fashion.

I’ll still have Fish and Chips for lunch on Good Friday, and go to Church at 3 o’clock in the afternoon.

I’ll probably still eat more than I need to, because hey, it’s Easter. Raffaello cupcakes, anyone?

DSC02032

I’ll probably still receive a good haul of Easter eggs to spread out over my desk, despite how old I am.

And I’ll probably still scab up some bargain Creme Eggs and Malteaster bunnies at the shops on Tuesday, even though I don’t need anymore chocolate.

When I think about Easter, I certainly don’t think about the insulin injections, the finger pricks, the carb counting, the correcting, the bolusses, the highs or the hypos that have come into play since 2010.

I fondly think of all the things that have stayed exactly the same.

I hope you have a very happy, safe and relaxing Easter long weekend.

Thanks for continuing to read Type 1 Writes this year and for being ever so kind and supportive. If you enjoy reading this blog as much as I do writing it, please do share it with those around you. 

Falling Off The Wagon

5 Comments

In all honesty I have kind of fallen off the wagon in the past few days, which I could put down to a couple of things.

Temptation. Mine was in the form of 25 cent Malt-Easter chocolate bunnies and Cadbury Marvellous Creations Easter eggs (seriously, if you have not tried these, what are you even doing with your life?) And even though I had the best of intentions to share them around, not all of them made their way to the chocolate basket at home.

Cooler weather. If there’s one thing I do love at the moment, its the cooler nights and being able to get cozy in front of the telly. But sadly, its also the perfect climate for being lazy and comfort eating. On Sunday I settled down in front of Despicable Me (how have I not seen this sooner?) and ended up chowing down a whole bag of Red Rock Deli Chips (Honey Soy Chicken, of course).

Exhaustion. Mostly work related and just feeling run off my feet all day. By the time I get home I’m ready to flop and can’t really be bothered with much else. Cue the lotto Gods (yeah right). But more realistically, I am perservering with my blog and want to make some sort of career from it in the future.

On Sunday morning I woke up to a beautiful blood sugar reading of 21.0. Not really a suprise considering all the fatty junk food I had eaten (fats raise your BGLs several hours later), but still a scare. I knew I’d gone too far. My blood sugar had been sitting at that horrible level for the past 8 hours (probably more) that I’d been sleeping. I absolutely hate when that happens. Nothing annoys me more. Then cue the feelings of guilt, followed by scary thoughts of possible diabetes complications from the damage I’d done to my body. How could I have been so irresponsible, so stupid?

I hastily jabbed myself with some insulin, before heading to the kitchen. My mouth was left dry from all of the sugar and sodium I had consumed the day prior, and I was dying for a refreshing cup of tea. I refused to eat until my levels went down, although I can’t say I was feeling very hungry anyway. Damn shame too, because weekend breakfasts are my favourite time of week. The two days where I can actually take my time and enjoy something better than a hasty bowl of cereal. And I’d ruined it.

There’s not much of a point to this post other than to tell you that I’m not perfect. Nobody is. And I’ve no doubt you’ve found yourself in a similar situation at some point. Which is why I felt it was so important to share this. While I truly regret what I did, I think it was also the perfect wake up call (or in my case, scare) that I needed to start being sensible again.

Please tell me I’m not alone in this – have you been in a similar situation before?

Taking a Break From Diabetes at Easter

9 Comments

I am sitting here on this balmy Easter Sunday with an extremely full stomach after a big day of indulgence.

My day began with an early coffee and some leftover dolcini (Italian sweets) from our family get together last night. After early Mass a Baileys was in order along with plenty of helpings from the chocolate basket on the coffee table (that was my breakfast, in case you were wondering!). On the menu for lunch it was pasta bake (like lasagne but with pasta), which has become somewhat of a festive tradition in our house, accompanied by mini pizzas and red wine. After a brief rest in front of the telly an array of deserts including Rocky Road, Red Velvet Cupcakes, Cannoli and more Easter eggs awaited us.

And let’s just say that this was actually a good year. After failing last year, I actually managed to give up chocolate for the most part of lent (minus two accidents!). I also didn’t have this at home to tempt me this year…

IMG_4230

Its the prize I won at work last year for correctly guessing the 510 easter eggs sitting in that jar! 510! It ended up sitting on our coffee table until about July, tempting the whole family to grab one every time we walked past.

Needless to say I was sick of chocolate by the time it was over. Anyway…

All I really wanted to say today is that even though this behaviour would likely give my doctor a heart attack, diabetes is a 24/7 job, 365 days of the year. Its not something that I can leave at my office desk at 5pm on Friday and return to at 9am on Monday. And frankly, I’m sick of people telling me “oh, you shouldn’t be eating this, should you?” without fully understanding diabetes. So long as I am aware of what I am consuming and how I have to respond, I think I’ve earned a day (or two!) of indulgence.

Cheers for all the fantastic support so far, and wherever you are in the world, HAPPY EASTER!

Bring on the food hangover tomorrow…