Insulin Pump

First Week On The Insulin Pump

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The last two weeks have been an absolute blur. This month has been diabetes overload. The new devices that are attached to me are a big reminder of that, although not necessarily in a bad way. My desk is an absolute mess of cable cords, information booklets, carb counting books and test strip containers. Every time I clean it up, I end up needing to pull the stuff out again.

I’ve been asked so many times about how I was feeling in the lead up to insulin pump day. Yet the reality didn’t actually set in until I was at diabetes clinic last Monday morning. Some of the other questions around it, however, have been rather amusing.

So when do you go in for your surgery?

Is it like a computer that’s strapped to your back?

It’ll be quite heavy. Will you still be right to work here?

Does the insulin go in through an IV line?

And my favourite, courtesy of one of my Aunts:

They’re going to have to cut you open! They’re going to have to cut you open!

It’s so bloody hard to explain what it actually is, so I’m really looking forward to being able to pull out my pump and show everyone.

Sidenote: My favourite diabetes hack from Friday’s Diabetes Blog Week prompt goes to Laddie at Test Guess and Go – objects photograph better on colours.

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The biggest misconception here, is that people thought I was taking time off for a physical recovery after the insulin pump. The truth is, it’s been more of a mental one. I’ve slept over almost every alarm that I’ve set for myself during the night to test, simply because my brain is fried from diabetes. Even harder, is the fact that most people won’t see the huge learning curve of these initial weeks.

Every night this week, I’ve been putting my overnight basal insulin rate to the test. Seeing if it will hold my BGLs steady, drop me further, or make me spike. Every morning, I’ve plugged my devices into the computer and analysed the results. Having access to such detailed data through my FreeStyle Libre (I received a reader and two sensors free of charge – further disclosures are here) has been helpful in tracking the movement of my BGLs overnight, and making changes to my basal insulin rate. It’s also a challenge not to respond to those annoying trend arrows and micromanage data. 

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Having both my diabetes educator, and my family to talk it through with each day has been a huge support. I’ve sorely missed my educator’s guiding hand over the weekend, and I hope that I haven’t veered too far away from the road in my decision making. Being home to navigate my way through it this past week has also been a massive relief. But I’m also a little overwhelmed at the new factors that will be thrown into the mix when I head back to work tomorrow.

This past week has taken enormous patience. I’ve hardly even made a dent in my homework. Once my overnight basal rate holds me steady, I’ll move onto testing my morning basal insulin rate, where I’ll have to deal with morning cortisol glucose dumps. Then the afternoon, and then the evening. Then fine tune Insulin to Carbohydrate ratios, and correction ratios.

It’s hard to remind myself that this will take time to get right.

Amongst all of this, it was hard to believe that it was also my birthday yesterday. 

It was such a relief to have that guidance from the pump in bolussing insulin for my birthday dinner, rather than my lazy guesstimates. It was so nice to simply pull out the pump from my pocket, and push a few buttons to bolus for the cake. 

The pump is one of the greatest birthday gifts I could have wished for this year. It’s a brand new chapter for my diabetes, and I’m confident the change will be a positive one.

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The Healthcare Experience

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It’s Day 4 of Diabetes Blog Week, and so far I’ve managed to make my way through all of Monday and Tuesday’s posts, and comment on a fair chunk of them. Today it’s time to tackle the topic I’m most excited about. Here is today’s prompt:

Most people who live with a chronic illness end up with a lot of experience when it comes to dealing with healthcare. How would you improve or change your healthcare experience? What would you like to see happening during medical visits with your healthcare team? How about when dealing with your health insurance companies? What’s your Healthcare Wish List or Biggest Frustration? Today is the day to share it all!

I’m pretty grateful that I live with diabetes in Australia. I attend a diabetes clinic in a public hospital which is completely free of charge, and hooks me up with any related service I need. Private Health Insurance covers hospital care, and the cost of my brand new $9,000 insulin pump (posts to come next week). Diabetes consumables and insulin are heavily subsidised by the Australian government. All in all, I never need to worry about how I will make ends meet with diabetes here in Australia.


My biggest frustration, however, is that I feel my healthcare professionals don’t often have enough time for me. I was diagnosed as a young adult, which meant that getting a grasp on diabetes education and self management was a lot easier. I was quickly weaned off diabetes education as soon as I could manage on my own. My clinic has a long patient list and waiting times for appointments can often span months. My chart probably looks a lot better compared to most of the other patients in the clinic, which means I am pushed out of the endocrinologist’s office as quickly as possible.

But what about if I’m not happy? What if I don’t want to settle for satisfactory? What if I want to do better with my diabetes? What if I have the potential to do better?

Over the past year or so, I’ve really had to learn to stand up for myself and what I want from my healthcare team. During a time of burnout last year, I had to ring up and chase appointment cancellation slots down at the clinic. I had to do the research, attend the information evenings and tell my diabetes educator that I wanted to go onto an insulin pump. I had to make my goal clear in front of my healthcare team, one that was beyond the “satisfactory” point where I was at.

Nobody else was going to help me, even if there was a benefit to my health. There is simply no time for me in a busy diabetes clinic with a high volume of patients. It’s great that I am a “switched on” patient, but the sad reality is that not every person with diabetes is. Not every person is in a place where they are able to speak up for what they want. It can be hard just to accept and become comfortable with this condition, alone.

One person I would like to praise is my diabetes educator. I know that she is under the pump. Yesterday, she told me that she is under pressure to cut one hour education sessions down to 30 minutes. Yet she always makes herself available to me outside of appointments by both phone and e-mail.

I’m still in uncertain territory at the moment with the insulin pump. I’m testing my basal insulin rates overnight, and checking to see whether they keep my glucose levels steady or not. Being able to talk the adjustments through with Gwen over the phone and by e-mail these past few days is a big relief. I haven’t leaned on this kind of support as much in the past, but I know that I intend on doing so in the next few months.

Technology is also amazing. When I was first diagnosed six years ago, I was given a meter and a logbook. Today I have meters that log my blood sugar levels and calculate my insulin doses. I have devices like the Insulinx and the FreeStyle Libre which are computer friendly. I am using the amazing Diasend software, that allows me to upload the data from my insulin pump, glucose meter and FreeStyle Libre into one place. Gwen can instantly see the reports on the other end.

My biggest takeaway here, is to stand up for what you want. Don’t be afraid to lean on your healthcare team, but also the people around you who can encourage you to do so. Your health is so worth it.

To read other posts related to today’s prompt, click here.

More Reasons For The Insulin Pump

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It feels like forever ago that I made the big decision to switch to an insulin pump, and now the big day is only two weeks away.

Over these past couple of months, one of my reasons for making the big switch is becoming much clearer.

I cannot wait to be able to fine tune my insulin to better suit the time of day.

I usually head to bed at around 10pm most nights, which is usually before all of my rapid acting insulin from dinner has worn off. I often find myself needing a good correction dose later on, and I’m not awake to be able to do this. If I’ve eaten something really Low GI like Pasta, it often needs some delayed insulin to cover it. If I’ve eaten something higher in fat or protein, ditto. So most nights, I end up setting 1am or 2am alarms which allow me to test and correct. It’s a lot of work.

Lantus tends to work best when I eat a similar amount of carbohydrates each day. Some nights, 10 units isn’t enough to keep me stable through the night. Some nights, 10 units will send me plummeting to lows. Other nights, my blood sugar will hold nicely until 4am, and then begin to plummet. Ideally, I imagine that my pump would be able to deliver a heavier background insulin rate between say, 10pm and 1am, and then a lighter rate for the rest of the evening.

Part of me is ridden with guilt. I feel like I have failed injections, and that I should have been able to get them right. I question whether I am getting the pump to be more lazy with my diabetes. I feel guilty for demanding an expensive piece of diabetes technology, when other people in the world can’t afford insulin alone. I feel guilty for not having the willpower to follow a regimented diet. I feel like I have a bad diet, simply because I can’t get my blood sugar levels quite right around the food that I eat.

However, none of this could be further from the truth.

I am working hard – extremely hard – with a very demanding condition. A condition that never lets me rest, and is changing all the time. I am striving, constantly, to do better. I know exactly why I am getting an insulin pump, and what I want from it. I haven’t made this decision lightly. I don’t eat exactly the same thing day in and day out. I enjoy variety in my diet, and I don’t apologise for it.

I’m going to try and stop feeling so guilty.

It’s my diabetes, and my choice in the way that I manage it.

Let the final countdown to pump day begin…