Peers

My Diabetes Family

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Diabetes is an incredibly isolating condition to live with. Nobody around me can see the relentless decision making, thought processes and feelings that I am left to deal with on my own. To add to that, I do most of the housework including finger pricks, pump maintenance and eating glucose tabs in a quiet place.

When I was first diagnosed, I didn’t know a single other person like me. Over the weekend, I connected with three fellow type 1s, each of whom had developed strong peer support networks within a short timeframe after their diagnosis. I was in awe. I didn’t even think of searching for diabetes in my search bar or on Facebook. Mind you, I can’t say that I would have had an open mind to peer support at the time. Regardless, I kind of stumbled across it by accident.

Abbott’s first DX event in 2016 is a memory that will always hold a special place in my heart. It was the first real time I had spent in the company of a group of people with diabetes just like me. It was a place where I was finally able to put faces to many OzDOC folk who I had only ever chatted with online.

Today, I count myself lucky that I have so many more ‘tribes’ of people with diabetes that I can rely on for peer support. They truly have changed my outlook on life with diabetes for the better.

Some are near, while others are further away. Some are people with diabetes, while others are connected to diabetes. I chat with them online and see them in person at diabetes meetups. I’ve learned a lot from them, and they have definitely inspired me. They are the ones who truly ‘get’ it. They are a reminder that I am not alone in the highs, the lows, the unicorns, the emotions and everything inbetween.

I’m also super grateful for my own two parents, who have supported me unconditionally since the day I was diagnosed (or should I say, born!). Little things like offering to accompany me to appointments in the earlier days, listening to me talk about diabetes, helping me out financially and reminding me that they’ll always have my back.

On World Diabetes Day, Diabetes Australia are asking us to shine a light on ‘My Diabetes Family.’

Today I’d like to raise a coffee mug to mine.

You have all truly changed my life for the better.

I honestly don’t know what I would do without all of you.

Drawing Parallels to ‘The Good Doctor.’

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Inbetween heat packs, Nurofen capsules, bed rest, a visit to my doctor and checking my blood sugar levels, I’ve spent the better part of a few sick days at home binging on The Good Doctor this week.

The series revolves around Dr Shaun Murphy, a surgical resident at San Jose St. Bonaventure hospital. Shaun isn’t any ordinary doctor. Shaun has autism, coupled with savant syndrome which allows him to see and connect the finer details that others don’t.

Shaun is different to those around him. He is often misunderstood by others. Those around him are often doubting his intelligence and his capabilities. In a way, Shaun’s struggles are not that different to someone who has diabetes.

There are definitely days where I feel misunderstood by those around me. I have my moments where I feel as though I’m answering the same questions that the same people have asked me before. I often wonder whether employers see diabetes work on my resume and doubt my ability to fulfil the advertised role (yes I can). I often wonder whether those around me see diabetes as a weakness (hint: it’s not).

I have superior intelligence when it comes to health, physical activity, nutrition and diabetes management, simply because I deal with these on a daily basis. I’d even go as far as to say that my intelligence is superior to some of the diabetes organisations and healthcare professionals that I deal with because of my own very valuable lived experience.

Shaun often can’t help but speak his mind in the series, without any regard for those around him or their feelings. This is the one distinction that I can draw against him and autism. I don’t have to be brutally honest when I am dealing with diabetes around others. I have a filter, and I can use it to spare other people’s feelings, even when they upset or frustrate me. If I don’t feel like explaining diabetes in order to explain myself, I don’t have to.

Dr Shaun Murphy is such a damn relatable character. It’s kind of refreshing to see someone so different on television. Someone who shares in some of the struggles many people with disabilities and chronic conditions do. Watching Shaun overcome some of those hurdles, often without even realising, is so uplifting to see.

After spending the last couple of weeks ripping the authenticity of Married at First Sight to pieces, The Good Doctor is by far one of the most genuine pieces of television I’ve seen in a long time. A perfect binge for the upcoming Easter break.

My Own Worst Critic

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Throughout my childhood, my parents constantly told me that I shouldn’t compare myself to others. Unless I had done poorly on my Year 12 English exam, in which case it was perfectly okay for them to ask me what scores the other guys in my class had obtained…

It’s easier said than done, right?

When it comes to diabetes, I am my own worst critic.

It’s so easy to feel guilty when I wake up to a number that’s out of range.

It’s so easy to place blame for a hypo that was caused by a lapse of better judgement.

It’s so easy to feel anxious about my future during times when my diabetes management might not be so smooth sailing.

Connecting with, and meeting other people with diabetes has been nothing short of amazing. Everyone has their own, unique story to tell. Everyone is passionate about their story, and the way that they manage their diabetes. I drank in the knowledge. I felt inspired, motivated, and dare I even say passionate about diabetes. I no longer felt so isolated, or so alone when it came to living with diabetes.

However after immersing myself in this world for a while, there also comes a point where I might begin comparing myself to other people.

Why aren’t I going for a run every morning?

Why am I not able to wear a CGM without letting it overwhelm me?

Why aren’t I eating clean?

Why don’t I have that hba1c?

Why isn’t my graph as flat as that one?

Why don’t I practice mindfulness?

Why am I not bursting with energy when I woke up this morning?

As amazing as this world is, there also comes a point where I have to put all of these perspectives into a box and focus solely on my own. 

I am not that person who goes running every morning. I am not that person who is reading my latest blood sugar levels from an array of devices. I am not that person who is eating clean, super mindful and bursting with energy either.

I’m no Matt or Joe or Anna or Angela.

I’m just Frank.

And that’s all that really matters.