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Hypos

Three Hypos in One Night

December 15, 2015 by Frank 2 Comments

It was a cool, breezy Summer evening. That perfect kind of early Summer weather that never seems to last long enough.

We’d had a barbecue lunch that day. Steak, sausages, eggs, onion, salad and cherries. The kind of lunch that left me feeling like it was Christmas Day – stuffed, sleepy and happy.

I wasn’t particularly hungry by dinner time. I wanted to make sure that my blood sugar levels had stabilised before bedtime after that barbecue, and I didn’t want to spoil my appetite for breakfast the next morning. I had some leftover salad and cherries, and gave myself a small correction dose.

14 units of Lantus is what had been keeping me stable those past few nights. 14 units. I figured with that big barbecue lunch, 14 units would do the trick once again.

I sat down outside with my laptop after dinner, catching up on some of my dBlog reading. I started browsing for Christmas gift ideas a little later on, but somehow ended up comparing prices of items on my own Christmas want list.

My blood sugar levels were looking good during the course of that night, clocking in at 7.1 and 6.2. I had the best of intentions to settle in for an early night before the start of another working week. Little did I know, however, that my diabetes had other intentions.

I was 3.8 at 9.18pm. I figured that the majority of my rapid acting insulin had worn off. I thought 3 marshmallows would do the trick, but I gave 4 just to be safe. 20g of carbs, because I was about to go to sleep. I laid in bed, surfing on my phone for a while longer, until it was nearing 10pm. I was a perfect 7.6, but I was convinced that I’d given myself too much for that hypo. I set the alarm for midnight, ready to catch a rebound high in it’s tracks.

That was hypo number one.

I woke up a while later, and my pyjama pants were sticking to the sweat on my thighs. I knew that I didn’t need to test, but I needed to know how low I was. 3.2. I reached for the bag of Marshmallows beside my bed, carefully counting them out in my hand so my hypo induced brain wouldn’t forget how many I’d eaten. One, two, three, four, five. I shoved the 25g of carbs into my mouth and rested my head back on the pillow, feeling instant relief.

I finally noticed that it was 11.53pm, and switched off the midnight alarm on my phone. By this point, I figured that I’d given myself more Lantus than I needed. By this point, I knew that there wouldn’t be any rebound highs to catch that night. By this point, I realised that these hypos were a consequence of skipping dinner. I switched out the light, and went to sleep.

That was hypo number two.

By 4.30am, I was startled awake by my favourite sound in the world. I felt shaky once again. I wasn’t sure if it was another hypo, or if I didn’t have enough blankets on the bed. My meter confirmed that it was the former, clocking in at a very hypo 3.4.

I shuffled into the kitchen, my mouth tasting of dry sugar, and prepared myself the most refreshing thing I could think of. A bowl of Weet Bix, a sliced banana and lots of cold milk.

As I sat there relishing the cold, refreshing milk on my dry throat, I thought about what a great start to a Monday morning it had been.

That was hypo number three.

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Posted in: Dealing with Diabetes, Multiple Daily Injections Tagged: Diabetes, Hypos, Injections, Lantus, MDI, Sleep

Wednesday Hypo

November 26, 2015 by Frank 7 Comments

We were standing around the table in the warehouse, slicing open boxes as we do every morning at work. I was left in stitches after a hilarous moment that you had to be there to find funny. I laughed for several minutes, my sides in stitches and my eyes watering with tears of laughter. I haven’t had such a good laugh in a long time, and it felt so good.

As the laughter subsided, I focussed my attention back towards slicing open those boxes. I yawned loudly, several times, as I tried to get on with the task at hand. “Early night for you!” One of my colleagues exclaimed. I was all of a sudden devoid of energy, and couldn’t be bothered in the slightest to get on with the task at hand. I stopped and leant on the table. I so badly wanted to sit down and rest. And maybe not get up again. I told the guys around me that I was exhausted from laughing so hard, but I knew that couldn’t be further from the truth.

I had no doubt in my mind that I was hypo. I’ve had hundreds of typical hypos in my lifetime, but none are as unique as the ones that happen while I’m at work. And as I stood there, yawning, I pondered three possible options in my mind.

Option one: I was only half an hour away from my mid morning coffee and banana. My hypo can hold out for another half an hour, easily, I told myself. I bet I’m not even that low.

Option two: I could stop and have my morning tea break now, albeit earlier than usual. But then the rest of the morning will drag, I reminded myself. By then, I’ll really be yawning. 

Option three: I could duck out and grab a muesli bar from my locker. I hate eating in front of others, I thought to myself. Plus, I’ll probably spoil my appetite and won’t be able to enjoy the coffee break that I crave each morning.

I stubbornly settled on option one. I continued slicing open those boxes, lazily. I continued to yawn, over and over. My legs felt like jelly, ready to give up on me at any minute now. Every passing minute felt like an ordeal, and I could not believe that I still had the better part of half an hour to go.

I finally gave up, with my urge to satisfy that hypo overpowering my will to stay put. I ducked out of my work area, and quickly crammed a muesli bar into my mouth. Opting for that muesli bar was like having that piece of cake I’d been craving all day. All of a sudden, I was back to my normal self. I had the energy to stand up straight, rip open boxes, and get on with the job.

Shortly after, I was called upon to pull down some heavy items from up above. As I was standing there on the ladder, balancing an akwardly heavy box in my arms, I didn’t want to imagine what would have happened had I not treated that hypo.

Remember the ‘Humans of Diabetes’ blog post that I wrote for a company called AkibaH? Well, these guys are launching Glucase, a Smartphone case that is a complete Glucose Meter. There’s a nice visual of the product here, as well as an option to fund their campaign if you are interested.

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Posted in: Dealing with Diabetes Tagged: Diabetes, Hypos

My Week on Diabetes Autopilot

August 31, 2015 by Frank Leave a Comment

I went to give my insulin dose after lunch. I dialled it up and stuck it where it needed to go. As I put my insulin pen away, I stopped and tried to think about what I’d done. How many units had I given myself? What did I have for lunch? Less than a minute had passed, and I couldn’t even remember.

I’ve been stuck on diabetes autopilot, and that routine has been on repeat every day in the past week. A fairly busy week, mind you. I’ve had to shake off a cold without any sick leave because of my responsibilities at work. I’ve had to wake up an hour earlier. Despite my best efforts, my body refused to fall asleep an hour earlier at night. And after imagining all the possibilities of an earlier finish, the reality has been falling asleep on the couch in the afternoons.

It was morning tea time on Friday morning. I was having my usual apple and Muesli bar. My blood sugar was 13.1, thanks to the cappuccino with 1 sugar I’d had earlier. Driven by my urge to bring it back down, I grabbed my insulin pen and quickly jabbed in 5 units. Normally, being on my feet at work would cover the apple. Meanwhile the muesli bar was a nut and seed variety, and had a lot less carbs than the ones I normally eat. I wasn’t thinking straight that morning. I’d already set myself up for a hypo, I just couldn’t see it yet.

Half an hour later, I was beginning to feel exhausted as I carried out my work. I wanted nothing more than to sit down somewhere. I was constantly sighing and loudly exhaling air from my mouth. I was nodding along when others were speaking, lacking the energy to talk back to them. I felt warmer and sweatier than normal. I didn’t have to go and check my blood sugar, I already knew that I was hypo.

I grabbed a muesli bar from the stash in my locker (this one had 24g of carbs) and walked back out into my work area. There was only one person around at the time, who knows that I have diabetes, but I still felt rude for eating in front of her. “Have you not gone for morning tea yet, Frank?” she asked me. “No, I’m just low and need some sugar,” I replied. “Oh, of course you do!”

I knew that the hypo was fixed, but those feelings of exhaustion just wouldn’t go away. And there was just something about coming off of a bad hypo that made me crave those carbs and sugar even more. So I decided to head off for an early lunch and grabbed a Supershake, a Cheese and Bacon Roll, a block of Lindt chocolate and a Jam Donut doused in sugar (I know, not your model diabetic!).

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In that moment as I sat there in the staff room, those carbs had never tasted better. That rich cheese and salty bacon hit the savoury spot on my tongue perfectly. The sugar on top of that donut stuck to my fingers and my face, and I felt high. Drowning it down in that thick, chocolatey supershake was heaven on earth. And after a few squares of chocolate, I’d finally had enough.

I went easy on the insulin dose, because I knew I’d be on my feet for another 2 hours. By the time I got home, I was a lovely 21.3. I gave another 10 units, and then decided to play the waiting game. I was 17.4 an hour later, 14.9 after that, and 11.9 by dinnertime.

I have no explanation to offer. It was just one of those days. Thank God it was Friday, because I really needed some rest.

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Posted in: Dealing with Diabetes, Diabetes and Food Tagged: Carbs, Diabetes, Food, Hypos, Junk Food

Building Trust With My Endocrinologist

August 10, 2015 by Frank Leave a Comment

I have struggled to place my trust in endocrinologists over the years. Trust that I can comfortably pour my heart and complete honesty on the table. Trust that I’ll receive total support and complete understanding in return. Trust that any and every judgement will be reserved. And trust that I won’t walk out feeling fragile and disheartened once again (you can read about that here).

Because trust might mean admitting that I had hypos every day last week. Trust might mean confessing to eating a massive dinner on Thursday and then having high blood sugar levels for the rest of the night. And trust might mean admitting to feeling overwhelmed and frustrated by diabetes at the moment. On some level, I’m scared of what will come next. Will she tell me that my diabetes control is terrible? Will she threaten me with complications? Will she tell me that I need to be locked away in a mental hospital because I can’t deal with it all?

Around two years ago, I was transferred from the ‘young adult’ to the ‘adult’ diabetes clinic at my hospital. I was no longer a newly diagnosed, high priority patient. I felt a great sense of independence, achievement and liberation over my diabetes. And I was finally given an endocrinologist who I could call my diabetes specialist (it was a bit of a russian roulette before). Over time, I’ve become more and more comfortable with her. I’ve been able to place a greater level of my trust in her. And each time I go there, I’ve felt confident in sharing more with her. And Wednesday’s appointment must have been my most successful yet.

First up was my hba1c result. It was a few points higher than last time, but I felt satisfied that it had gone up rather than down. I shared that I’d been having lots of hypos prior to my holiday. I’d become obsessive compulsive in checking my blood sugar levels, and was trying to correct them shortly after eating dinner. The holiday did a perfect job of taking my mind away from obsessive testing, and my blood sugar levels had stabilised nicely in these past few weeks I’ve been back. I’ve just had My Perfect Week!

Next up was insulin doses, and we talked through my lunch. 7.9 before lunch, cheese toastie on Burgen bread with 4 units of insulin, 4.6 after lunch. Perfect. As usual, that dreaded question of how many hypos in a week came up. And as usual, I gave a vague answer that did have some truth. I was having significantly less hypos, and none were happening overnight anymore.

I brought up my recent eye concerns. I told her about my twitch, and that I’d gone and had my diabetic retinopathy scan in the process too. My recent bloodwork came back with good kidney and urine functions and some apparently ‘amazing’ cholesterol levels also.

We went into the exam room, where she had a look at the injection sites on my stomach. I hate this part because I always get really ticklish at the pokes and prods! She couldn’t believe that I used 6mm needles because I am so skinny, and gave me some 4mm needles to try at home.

It felt great to review and talk over everything in there. And as I voiced my issues, I made some realisations about myself that my endo seemed to notice as well. I was a proactive patient. I seemed to be able to identify and stay on top of my issues. I was among the least concerning of her patients. And according to her, this was the best case scenario she could expect from one of her patients.

I definitely walked out of there with a stronger focus and motivation to get me through the next few months. I’m glad I rang for that cancellation and didn’t wait until January. “Don’t test!” my endo jokingly said to me as I walked out of there, a smile on my face.

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Posted in: Diabetes and Healthcare Professionals Tagged: BGLs, Diabetes, Endo, Endocrinologist, hba1c, Hypos

To My Dear Friend Mr Hypo

August 6, 2015 by Frank 2 Comments

To My Dear Friend Mr. Hypo,

I’ve been in denial about you. For a very, very long time, I’ve been pretending that you don’t exist. I’ve done a pretty good job of hiding the way you make me feel. In fact, the people around me wouldn’t even know that you are there.

I am writing to say that you are one of my least favourite things about diabetes.

You have a knack of waking me up in the middle of the night.

You are the reason I swear.

You are the reason my family and friends see me in a bad mood.

You leave me feeling ashamed.

You leave me feeling guilty.

You leave me feeling demoralised.

You make me feel about this big.

And you know exactly how to make a grown man cry.

For a long time, I’ve struggled to admit that you are one of the biggest hurdles I’ve had to overcome. Because saying that you have gotten the better of me is like admitting defeat. And admitting that I am not controlling you as well as I should be.

Locking you away two weeks ago was one of the best things I ever did. During these past two weeks, I’ve had some of my best nights sleep all year. During the past two weeks, I’ve rediscovered what it’s like not to be bothered even once between the hours of 10pm and 6am. And during the past two weeks, I’ve woken up feeling on top of the world.

Every morning when I test my blood sugar levels, I know exactly how you feel every time you come to visit. I raise my arm in victory, and quietly exclaim “yes!” I am so pleased that you have not caused a single wave in my blood sugar levels for 8 whole hours straight. And I am so pleased at the thought of those perfect blood sugar levels for 8 whole hours straight. There is no better way to start my day.

I think I have finally found the key that will keep you locked away for a very, very long time. I’ve hung it up on a hook labelled ‘Patience.’ With ‘Patience,’ I am able to resist the temptation of checking my blood sugar levels straight after dinner. With ‘Patience,’ I am able to resist the temptation to over correct my blood sugar levels to get them where I want them to be now. And with ‘Patience,’ I have finally been able to rediscover myself away from you.

And that person is someone I look forward to getting to know.

With no regards,

Frank

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Posted in: Dealing with Diabetes Tagged: BGLs, Diabetes, Hypos
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