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Giving Up Lent, For Lent

February 15, 2016 by Frank 1 Comment

Of the many things I have attempted to give up for Lent over the years, I can only remember one that I actually saw through until Easter. I managed to give up my favourite computer game, Captain Comic, for a whole forty days back in primary school. I fondly remember playing it on our very first computer in the ’90s, that a family from school salvaged for us from a rubbish heap.

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In recent years, my motivation to keep doing Lent is diabetes. Even though I’m an adult and I’m no longer forced to do Lent, I still like the idea of using it to change my “bad diabetes” habits. Give up chocolate, give up junk food, exercise, have perfect blood sugar levels and perhaps stick with it after Lent…

The reality is that I’ve failed almost every time. I’ll end up feeling guilty and unhealthy for breaking. I’ll end up feeling trapped by my diabetes, with no willpower to control my bad habits. Even when I have made it a fair way in, I’ve ended up subsiding and binge eating towards the end.

But I’m only human, and I shouldn’t have to apologise for my bad habits. Besides, Lent doesn’t just last forty days for me. I already give up a lot for my diabetes, throughout the whole entire year.

Money, for starters. Insulin, test strips, needles and even jellybeans aren’t cheap. In May I’ll be switching to an Insulin Pump, which only costs around $8,000. Thank goodness for private health insurance! Even though my expenses are heavily subsidised by the Australian government through the NDSS, diabetes is still not cheap and I can think of a million other things that I would rather put that money towards.

Food. I have to think carefully about every item of food that I put into my mouth. Carb content? Weight? Is it a pre-bolus food? Or does it need a delayed bolus? Feelings of satisfaction after a nice dinner are often replaced with feelings of guilt and anger if the follow up result is not ideal. I’ll often have to forego tempting foods for which the spike is just not worth it.

Thoughts. Diabetes is one of the first things I think about when I wake up in the morning. I’m constantly plagued with thoughts of where my blood sugar is sitting after a meal. Did I give too much insulin? Not enough insulin? Did I forget to bolus for something? Then at bedtime, I’m usually playing guessing games as to where my levels are headed through the night.

Confidence. It’s hard not to judge myself by my diabetes, when it’s on my mind all the time. It’s hard to feel good about myself when my diabetes isn’t going so great. As my diabetes gets older, I find myself thinking more and more about my future. About how well I am managing my diabetes, and whether I am “healthy” enough to withstand complications.

Time. Finger pricks, insulin injections, treating a high, correcting a low and just thinking about it all! Diabetes doesn’t stay on the desk at five o’clock on a Friday. There is no annual leave, sick days, personal leave or rostered days off. Finding the time to do ALL of this on top of life is a miracle sometimes.

Lent always makes me feel bad about myself, and I know that I’ll end up failing miserably. So this year, I’ve decided to give up Lent, for Lent. I’ll still be working towards some of my diabetes goals in the lead up to Pump Day in May.

But I certainly won’t be shying away from a slice of this Macaroon Cake I made last week. Happy Monday!

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Posted in: Dealing with Diabetes, Diabetes and Emotions, Diabetes and Food Tagged: Diabetes, Food, Lent

My Festive Season In 7 Adjectives

January 6, 2016 by Frank Leave a Comment

I don’t particularly believe in “rules” or “secret plans” when it comes to diabetes and the festive season. I don’t “prepare” my diabetes management for big events. For me it’s simply about good food, lots of insulin and regular blood glucose testing. After all, it’s only a few days of the year, and I feel better that I’m not missing out on anything because of diabetes. Well, except for the finger pricks, insulin injections and the part where I have to think about those things…

In 7 adjectives, my festive season looked something like this.

No Breakfast. I have breakfast almost every day, and yet I don’t remember having it once inbetween Christmas and New Year. I was eating way too much at lunch and dinner (and desert afterwards, of course!), that I simply wasn’t hungry when morning came around. Correction: breakfast consisted of iced coffee, biscuits, and even leftover desert on one or two occasions.

Lazy. According to the Health App on my iPhone (which isn’t accurate because I don’t always have my phone in my pocket), my average daily step count over the 4 day Christmas long weekend was 1,290 steps. On a normal working day, I would average between 15,000 to 20,000 steps. Lazy.

Night Owl. I can’t remember a single night during the break where I didn’t go to bed after midnight, and wake up after 9am. Which is a stark contrast to my very regimented 10pm bedtime and 5.50am morning alarm (thanks, work!).

Single Digits. According to my meter, my average blood glucose level over the 108 finger pricks in the past fortnight is 9.7. Single digits during Christmas – I’ll take that as a win!

Non-Existent Hypos. I can’t be bothered scrolling through my meter for concrete evidence, but hypos were almost non-existent during the break. This was, of course, because my blood sugar levels were running higher than normal thanks to festive activity! Correction: there was one nasty night of hypos at the movies, story coming soon.

More Insulin. That’s a given, considering what I’ve just described. I’m also a firm believer in upping my Lantus dose when I’m eating more than normal. My Lantus dose hovered between 14-18 units during the break. When I’m active and eating well, it normally sits at around 11 units. Considering I’ve had to use more than 20 units during previous festive seasons, I’ll take this as another win!

Food. And lots of it. From Christmas Day, New Years Day, and various family gatherings. There was prawn skewers, stuffed chicken thighs wrapped in prosciutto, cannelloni, mediterranean baked snapper, pasta bake, roasted veggies, cannoli, biscotti, cheesecake, trifle, panettone, glazed pudding and Baileys Irish Cream. And chocolate. Lots and lots of chocolate.

There was also time spent at the beach, trips to the shops, walks with our adopted dog who was staying with us, a night at the movies and multiple episodes of Downton Abbey and Mr Bean.

 

In a nutshell, it was a break.

I hope you had a great festive season.

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Posted in: Dealing with Diabetes, Diabetes and Food Tagged: BGLs, Christmas, Diabetes, Food

Dragging Diabetes Through the Christmas Season

December 18, 2015 by Frank 5 Comments

It’s definitely starting to feel like the end of the year. And I, for one, am feeling plain exhausted. Nothing out of the ordinary. Just that end of the year, over-it-all exhaustion.

I’ve had a lot of late nights recently. I’ve often sat down in front of the laptop with the intention of surfing the web for Christmas gift ideas. That’s often ended with me at the eBay checkout at midnight, after hours deliberating over goodies for myself. Last week it was a new phone case, a longer iPhone charging cable and some headphones with an extension cord. I was also hunting down an iPad, a new Medic Alert bracelet and a few diabetes books.

Work is beginning to feel plain monotonous. I don’t feel like I’m a human being during the mornings as I’m getting myself up and ready. I can no longer be bothered bringing my lunch from home. I feel about half as motivated than normal during the day. I stubbornly told myself that I’d work through it and save up my annual leave a few weeks ago. Now I feel like I am well and truly in need of a break.

I have zero motivation towards managing my diabetes well at the moment. There are get togethers and festive meals planned over the next couple of days. Boxes of chocolate, shortbread, Pannetone and candy canes are beginning to pile up at home. And there’ll be plenty of leftover food and deserts in the fridge to indulge in during the aftermath. I’m giving insulin injections my best guess, and closely monitoring my blood sugar levels about twice as much than normal.

Yet amidst all of this, I still somehow look forward to this time of the year. Going to the Christmas tree farm and cutting down our third real, live Christmas tree.

Seeing the suburbs light up in colourful Christmas lights in the middle of the Australian summer.

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Making the most of the sunshine and cool Summer weather before the heat sets in for the rest of the season. And yes, I can even spend Christmas at the beach!

Seeing family (some of them, at least!). Good food. Collapsing on the couch feeling stuffed and happy. Post Christmas bargain hunting (although I think I’ve already started on this one!)

Managing diabetes is hard work. I feel it more than anything at this time of the year, when everyone and everything else is taking time out to unwind at the end of the year. I would love to have the option for diabetes to shut up shop at this time of the year.

While that’s not a possibility for me, I am still proud to be able to enjoy this time of year. I can confidently say that diabetes hasn’t made Christmas too different since I was diagnosed. And in my eyes, that makes all the hard work and extra attention well worth the effort.

Merry Christmas. Wishing you a happy, and safe festive season.

– Frank

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Posted in: Dealing with Diabetes, Diabetes Musings, Insulin Pumps Tagged: Burnout, Christmas, Diabetes, Exhaustion, Food, Holidays

“How Do You Prepare For A Big Event Like This?”

December 7, 2015 by Frank 3 Comments

“So Frank, how would you prepare for a big event like this?” My aunty asked me from across the table.

You might not necessarily class a Sunday afternoon family function as a “big event.” However if you’re from an Italian (or European) family, or if you’ve ever been to one of their functions, you might have some idea as to the context of this comment.

Antipasto plates were first brought out that day, piled high with bruschetta, sundried tomatoes, artichoke hearts, arancini, priochutto, buffalo cheese, provolone cheese and bread. Followed by entrees of creamy ravioli filled with minced pork. For mains we had the choice of sirloin steak with roast potatoes, or grilled snapper. Then the trays of Dolce (sweets) were brought out, filled with biscotti, biscotti and more biscotti. That was followed by cake. Two cakes, actually, because we were celebrating a Christening and a birthday. Then there was Champagne for the toast, which I politely turned down, only to have another waiter come over and place a glass in front of me. This is pretty much typical of anything you refuse at a family function. And if you make a big fuss about it, then you’re obviously not feeling well. Finally, coffees were served (traditional Italian espresso, of course).

By now you probably think we’re crazy people.

And you’re probably expecting some strategic, well thought out answer to dealing with events like these.

I’m (reasonably) sensible when I’m at home. I eat breakfast every morning. I bring my lunch from home most days of the week.  I have home cooked meals at dinner time. I rarely drink alcohol, much to the disbelief of every healthcare professional who asks. I’ve never smoked or done drugs, either, for the record. Burgen bread, Weet Bix, multigrain crackers, fruit, water, nuts, eggs and muesli bars low in sugar form some of the daily staples in my diet. There’s also generous helpings of coffee, chocolate and the occasional cake, cannoli or other treat that tempts me throughout the day. I test my blood sugar levels ALL the time, and always remember to give my insulin accordingly. All in all, I’d say I’m pretty sensible.

So, when it comes to occasions like these, I honestly just enjoy myself. I don’t live by rules or restrictions. I’ll dial up a generous dose of insulin to account for what I eat. I’ll keep a close eye on my blood sugar levels in the hours afterwards. Normally I’ll need another shot a few hours later to account for the delayed effect of the fatty foods. And I normally increase my next long acting Lantus dose by 20 to 30%, because I find that it helps keep my levels more regulated against the increased carbs that I’ve eaten.

As I sat there explaining this to my Aunty, I could see the look of pity for me in her face. Unintentional, I’m sure, but a look of pity that I’ve seen all too often when talking about diabetes with others.

But I certainly didn’t pity myself that day.

The only thing that I did pity that day, was my aunt’s pity for me. Pity that was completely unnecessary.

Because I was still able to have a great time that day. I was still able to enjoy the good food. And I was able to successfully navigate my own diabetes through this occasion.

And I did it again, last week, when I enjoyed this delicious birthday cake that I never thought my sister would be able to pull off (not my birthday, FYI).

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And so did Grumps on the weekend. Seriously, love this quote.

@SuzieMay08 @everydayupsdwns I just think food is food. Insulin and carb calcs are just utensils I use to eat it along with knife and folk.

— The Grumpy Pumper (@grumpy_pumper) December 5, 2015

Bring on Christmas.

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Posted in: Dealing with Diabetes, Diabetes and Food Tagged: Diabetes, Food

Healthy Eating on World Diabetes Day

November 13, 2015 by Frank 1 Comment

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Tomorrow, November 14, is World Diabetes Day. This year’s theme centres around healthy eating as a management tool for both types of diabetes, and as a way to prevent some cases of type 2 diabetes.

Eating well has always been a core part of my diabetes management, particularly since I’m not a big “exercise” person.

I’ve learnt a lot about my food, over the years. When I first started out, I thought that brown bread was automatically better for my blood sugar levels. I religiously stuck to low fat foods, overlooking the other nutritional content that was good or otherwise. And, there was a lot of frustrating times spent writing things down and trying to look for patterns.

Today, I do my best to adopt a diet of low glycemic index (GI) staple foods. A low GI diet ensures that my blood sugar levels rise slowly and steadily after eating, rather than spiking rapidly and then crashing. This includes Burgen bread, Weet Bix, Plain Oats, fresh fruit, crackers that are rich in wholegrains, eggs, nuts and fruit free muesli bars during the day. And home cooked meals with salad or veggies at night time. I’ve also invested in a copy of The Low GI Diet Shopper’s Guide, which is my GI bible.

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I’ve also become extra cautious of the hidden sugars in my foods this year, particularly after watching That Sugar Film. Generally, I look for something with less than 10-15g of sugar per 100g, which is 10-15% total sugar in a product. Muesli bars with choc tops, berries and yoghurt drizzle are generally a no go. Fruit free and nut bars are generally my pick, but there’s very few decent choices on the supermarket shelves here in Australia.

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Ditto for yoghurt. I can’t stomach natural yoghurt no matter how good it is for me, so I usually opt for a plain vanilla. The biggest craze at the moment seems to be those colourful, sugar laden berry glazes on the bottom of the tub that you stir through when you go to eat it for the “visual” effect. I’d be better off having a block of chocolate or bowl of ice cream instead.

Then there’s the sugar in my coffee and tea. Prior to watching That Sugar Film, I had my coffee and tea with two sugars, in the form of artificial sweeteners. Today, I’m down to half a sugar in my coffee at home, and I drink my tea straight. How did I manage this? Commitment. First cutting down to one and a half spoons, and getting used to the taste. Then cutting down to one. And then down to half. And finally, none. Even if that meant chopping my Equal tablets into halves at home, I’m so glad that I did. And I now have more of a receptor to sweetness in the other foods and beverages that I consume.

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So, that’s not to say that I’m perfect. I still eat junk food sometimes. Potato chips, ice cream, lollies, chocolate and other deserts. I buy my lunch most Fridays. I buy coffees 2-3 times a week. I still go overboard sometimes, and I have to adjust my insulin to accommodate those times where I eat more than normal. Like this one time that I won the Easter egg raffle at work (I did share it, though!).

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But a healthy diet is a big part of my diabetes management. And hopefully it’s a part of yours, too.

You can read more about World Diabetes Day on the International Diabetes Federation website here.

There will be a 15 hour Twitter chat for World Diabetes Day tomorrow starting at 7am US Eastern Time (that’s 8pm Saturday in Western Australia, and 11pm in Eastern Australia). I will be moderating the 6-7pm hour of the chat. Follow the hashtag #WDDChat15 on Twitter to join in when you can!

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Posted in: Diabetes Advocacy, Diabetes and Food Tagged: Diabetes, Diet, Food, Healthy Eating, WDD, WDD15, World Diabetes Day
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