Libre-less

It’s no secret that I have continued to use the FreeStyle Libre with much enthusiasm in recent months, albeit intermittently. I frequently talk about it on Twitter, I often refer to trend arrows in my blog posts and it’s a popular subject of messages that arrive in my e-mail inbox. Not to mention how instagrammable that graph is, especially when the line is flat.

Yeah, paying $95 to monitor my blood glucose like this every two weeks absolutely sucks. But overall, it has improved the quality of my life, and I am starting to come around to justifying those costs.

For my needs, it is perfect. I check my blood sugar frequently through the day, so this fits the bill nicely in adding some convenience to that. I like that the hardware is minimal, and that it doesn’t use a lot of real estate on my body. The only upkeep is the round sensor every two weeks, which makes it a cheaper alternative to Continuous Glucose Monitoring.

I guess where I have struggled the most is setting boundaries around the data. I find it easy to become obsessed with the numbers after wearing it for too long.

My behaviour hasn’t been too healthy during the life of my last sensor. I’ve been compulsively checking my levels before I’ve even finished my dinner, and again on the couch in the evenings while I’m watching television. The trend arrows have been really frustrating to see at times, and I find it hard to remind myself that they are only temporary. Against better judgement, I do tend to micro manage data, which sends me low far more often than I should be.

So why haven’t I taken a break from it sooner? Firstly, I wanted to give myself every advantage in getting the best hba1c that I could. Turns out that I was being much too hard on myself, because it exceeded my expectations by a country mile. Then earlier this month, I hit a speedbump where I was literally spiking after everything that I ate. I was too scared to be without it until I had figured the problem out. But I am slowly moving past that issue (more on that, soon).

I’ve been Libre-less for almost a week now, and all that anxiety is gone. I stop to check my blood sugar prior to meals, and one and two hours after meals. I’m forced to think about whether I actually need to check my blood sugar, or whether I’m simply doing it because I can. My head isn’t consumed by numbers so much, and my mood isn’t dependent on trend arrows. In fact, the numbers have been better than they were during the life of my last sensor, and I’m not hypoing so often from micro managing.

The morale of this story is that time away from the tech is equally as valuable as the tech itself. It gives me a chance to actually appreciate the tools I am using, and what I’ve been able to achieve with them.

My life is more than just numbers, and time away from the tech is definitely helping me to realise this once again.