Last week, the confirmation letter for my upcoming endo appointment arrived in the mail.
All of a sudden, I’m no longer eating junk food in the afternoons. I’m turning down offers of lollies and chips at the tennis. I’ve pulled my Insulinx meter out of it’s drawer, and I’m suddenly counting carbs more meticulously, logging my insulin doses and downloading my blood glucose reports on my laptop. I’m thinking more carefully about what I’m eating, and the insulin doses I’m giving. I’m working furiously hard towards getting those overnight levels stable once again.
As usual, it’s that wake up call to get my blood sugar levels back into the best possible position ahead of my hba1c result in 6 weeks time.
So why, oh why, does it take a confirmation letter for me to better manage my diabetes?
If I’m being honest here, my diabetes has been lacking that dedicated effort since my last endo appointment in August. My last appointment went very well and I pulled out a good hba1c result. As soon as I came home, it was very easy to breathe a sigh of relief and take my foot off the pedal. It was easy to justify this to myself, with my next appointment being 6 months away. The longer I kept coasting along, the easier it was to keep coasting.
This sentiment probably echoes true for the better part of the last five years with diabetes.
While I wouldn’t say that my management is terrible, I simply lack that dedicated effort that will give me the results that I would like to see. I still test regularly, but I don’t think carefully enough about the choices I make and the insulin doses I give. I know that I struggle to sustain my hba1c results after endo appointments. I’ve been avoiding every opportunity for a hba1c test in the last few months for this very reason. I know that if I went for one today, it would likely be half a point higher.
I’m resolving to make more of a consistent effort in 2016. I’ve set myself a more specific goal of stable overnight numbers, rather than all round improvement that never works. I’m striving to bring my mysteriously unknown hba1c result down by half a point. I’m going to have my hba1c level tested more than twice a year. I’m going to review my progress throughout the year here at Type 1 Writes.
I’m also going to see how well I can manage with Multiple Daily Injections before coming to a final decision on the pump next month (which will be left until the very last minute, in usual Frank fashion).